Friday, August 12, 2011

two weeks later

I have wanted to post so much these past two weeks but have gotten no opportunity. My pen pal Joannie and I have been going going going for the whole time she's been here. and White Skinny Angel, you were right. My French is awful and Joannie's English is pretty bad too. thank God for sign language and facial expressions :P

I've been trying really hard to keep off fattening foods. while I've had no definite diet plan, I have been able to stay around 1,000 calories each day. Mainly I've been eating half portions skipping either lunch or breakfast. Hopefully when I get a chance to use a scale I'll be in a good place.

I could write about all the things we've been doing, but I don't have enough time to go over everything. I have only a few spare hours today to get ready for my graduation party tomorrow and I'm stealing a few minutes from that to write and read.

One thing I do want to say- yesterday was the 10 year anniversary of my mother's death. I can't believe a whole decade has passed since I last saw her. I know we wouldn't have gotten along, but I miss her for all those moments when mothers are supposed to be there. Like prom, or shopping for college, or someday picking out my wedding dress. And I miss knowing her like everyone else close to her  got to. I was just too young to ever really understand who she was. I'm sad about it, but I know I'll be okay.

I really want to make her proud. I'm going to finally lose this weight and be the very best person I could be. I want to do that. for me and for her.

I hope you all have a lovely weekend and that August has been treating you well.
love, Jackie
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5 comments:

  1. zetteAugust 12, 2011 at 7:54 PM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. AnonymousAugust 12, 2011 at 7:56 PM

    please keep yourself healthy, darling. try not to obsess over foods.
    xoxo
    z.

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  3. sofiaAugust 12, 2011 at 10:24 PM

    this is the first time i found about your mother, and i am truly truly sorry. im glad your enjoying the time with your pen pal.
    have fun at the graduation party.
    <3 stay lovely.

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  4. americaneagleloveAugust 12, 2011 at 11:52 PM

    I'm happy that you're having a great time with your pen pal. I've always wanted a pen pal in a foreign country, I love writing letters.

    I'm truly sorry to hear about your mother. You are very strong and I'm sure she is proud to have a beautiful daughter like you.

    Stay lovely. <3

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  5. CrashxBurnAugust 13, 2011 at 9:56 AM

    I look forward to hearing all about it when you have time to post more. :) I'm glad you guys have been having fun! I'm sorry about your mom. Mine died 7 years ago last April. :/ I miss her a lot sometimes. I hope you have fun at your graduation party ^^

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