West Coast- Holla!!!

I'm packing for my trip to San Francisco tomorrow. yay! I can't wait! my choir is going for this big festival and it's gonna be supper fun. We're going to see all this fun stuff, but what I'm most excited for is the red wood forest. I've always dreamed of seeing them. But we also get to see a tour of the city and go shopping and all that too. woot woot! It's kind of an expensive trip, so my grandmother is paying for it- she won the lottery in December (crazy right?! it was $15,000 so not a million dollars but definitely nothing to sneeze at!) and so she gave this trip to me for Christmas.

I just really hope I look good in the pictures there. I cried when I looked at all the Fame pictures. I look so fat! ugh... despite my lack of clothing in the picture I posted, it was the best one taken of me in all three days. grumble grumble grumble. Another thing I'm worried about is sticking to the diet plan. SGD has been difficult the past two days and I was home. how am I gonna keep on track when I'm away with all that tempting travel food around? sigh...

I had cake today. bleh. I think I'm up to 1000 calories and I have no will power to work out. I skipped track again too. I started crying in the locker room on Friday. being in last place all the time destroys my self esteem. it's becoming a battle between being sane and happy right now or being skinny. which do I want more? I'd like to think it's skinny, but I'm not sure.

anyways

my very first blogger award!
here it is:

thank you so much to Lu, Meg, Cat,  and Ariana for nominating me! I feel so loved <3 I absolutely love you guys, you are my safe haven away from all my crazy consuming thoughts and hectic confusing life. much much much love to you!

so seven facts about me:

I'm still afraid of the monsters that live under my bed and in my closet  and in the basement etc. (they're EVERYWHERE!!!) so I leap when I get out of bed so they can't grab my ankles and sprint up the stairs after I turn out the lights at night. you have to always be on your guard- monsters are sneaky creatures!

 All my favorite scented items are citrus. it makes me happy.

I've played 5 different instruments since I was 5. I took lessons in piano, flute, clarinet, trumpet, and guitar and gave up on all of them.Singing is my one true love.and does the kazoo count?

I fall on the first day of Virgo. but Virgo doesn't fit me at all. My horoscope is almost always wrong. I think I fit the Leo sign much better. This probably has something to do with the fact that I was born 2 weeks late, so was therefore meant to be a Leo. one day hardly counts, I think.

I have very long eyelashes. People ask me all the time if I'm wearing false lashes when I wear mascara. Once some lady even asked what kind of mascara I used when I wasn't wearing any at all.

The idea of marriage repulses me when I think about other people getting married. One person for my whole life? no thank you! but then I think of loving someone so much that spending your life with them only sounds like the best thing ever. That's real love. I hope I get a chance at that someday.

I know lots of random facts about a lot of subjects. I have an opinion on almost everything. 

I'll try not to nominate girls who already got the award. And since the rules say new girls, I'll try to stick to that as well, but there are a few old favorites (who haven't gotten the award yet) thrown in there as well! 

Know I love all you readers so much, and the girls who I follow. Even though we don't know each other in real life, I feel like we do know each other. We share these secrets, carry these complicated loads together. thank you all for being here for me and for sharing your lives with me. Together we can be anything we want to be!

1Alex

2Mae

3Emuhlee

4Charl

5Haley

6Sofia

7Athena

8Adeline

9Victoria

10Zette

I probably won't post until Monday, but I might find a way to post while I'm there. hopefully I'll have some nice pictures to share (and a good number from the scale as well)